The Ultimate Price of Growing Old

 

I’ve just tidied up some of my book collection, reminiscing the days I bought them home and devoured them. However, just like any other normal sensical reader out there, there are many that I haven’t read yet.

When words started to get blurry, and I had to get my first glasses, I gradually enjoyed reading and other meticulous hobbies less. I thought that was the price of growing old. When I breathed and sprained a muscle instead of being immortal when I was young, I thought that was the price of growing old.

They are not. The ultimate price of growing old is watching my parents and loved ones do the same. My dad is no longer the strong man I know, capable of almost anything. It pains me to see him taking longer and longer to get up from the floor (he loves playing with Locky) and how his back hunch, how my mom has less and less ability to do her hobbies, but regardless of that, both are still the first one to be there whenever we need them. It’s hard to hold Locky in my arms and know that the more I prepare for the imminent day of losing him, the harder it will be.

I wrote about humans being fragile and full of flaws because of our attachments to others and the what-if options of not having them. A projection, much? I think it’s fair to say that it’s a very real fear for many forever.

Somewhere, if you are not in a good place because you are missing someone or harboring the same fear as me, I wish you peace and strength.

I'm at another editing round of my new book and will be looking for beta readers soon. As long as one person likes my book, I'll continue writing. (Oh yeah, myself included) (I'm not as strong as my younger self, but I'm more stubborn and spiteful, and those keep me going :)

BOOK REVIEW: JOANNA JAMES' JOURNAL (TRISH HENRY GREEN)

 

What I like the most about this book is the earlier few chapters. The reality is gripping, and I feel for the character. The fear of growing old, getting out of the familiar and comfort zone, and watching something she has built over decades crumbling down. It's heartbreaking to see the indifference when someone closest to her slowly becomes a stranger, especially when she has given him her best younger years.

 

The almost drama-free separation also works well, and I can see it happening between two responsible adults. I'm grateful for it because I had become the shoulder to cry on and ears for the ugly and childish similar processes in the past. There were many moments when I wondered how something beautiful turned into an empty shell of itself, sometimes crushed and withered without a trace. So, I find the book's first quarter very powerful and realistic.

 

Regrettably, everything goes in another direction from there. It feels cringey and meta when every character the MC meets loves her book. The story turns into a mundane diary entry style with many fillers, but fair enough, it's a journal, after all. I understand the nature of slow burn in this kind of story, but nevertheless, I feel a bit lost, and unfortunately, it never picks up for me again. I sincerely hope these kinds of stories happen in real life somehow, somewhere, and often, but it gets fairy-tallish, which is the path many romance stories take as the ending. From the gripping emotional and realistic character's life, it turns into Melrose place strings of events.  The book sends the message that the character manages to overcome her fear, insecurities, and the biggest turn in her life, which I applaud. Unfortunately, it's hard to get the point across when everything comes that easy, and the MC has everything cut out perfectly for her financially and romantically with every support imaginable. I get that there are still 'ups and downs,' but I really think only a tiny percentage of ordinary people can relate to all those because it turns into a fairy tale that is loved by many daytime TV viewers and becomes unrealistic. I love being wrong and wish many people had this kind of life.

 

Moving past my nitpick, I think the book is well written, there are many likable characters, and the dialogues are believable. There are many funny snippets here and there, and I also like realistic characters like the fireman and the con artist who conducts the worst writing class ever. It's easy to continue reading, and I actually finished the last 60% in one sitting.

4 out of 5

 

BOOK REVIEW: WHEN THE MIND AWAKENS (OBINNA ONWUGBENE)

 

When I was young, I read How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie. To be honest, I barely remember what I read now, and I'm not sure it would work the same now that it has been almost three decades later. Still, I can safely say I learned several things from it, mainly because there are concrete ways to implement the strategies in realistic situations, not merely theories.

Personally, this book is exhausting to read. The points are repetitive, and it almost feels like, for each point, I would read multiple permutations that say the same thing, some theories also tend to repeat in another chapter. The book feels like a prolonged preaching without offering real insights or solutions. True, there are many good bits of advice here and there, but they are apparent points that barely add any skill or more profound understanding. Sometimes, the authors are a bit out of touch. These are not the actual quotes but the impressions I got. Do you feel stressed about bills? Then, pay the bills. Is there an obstacle? Overcome it. Be motivated. Surround yourself with influential people. Crank your self-esteem. Save your money. Believe in yourself. If you do these, you will succeed.

They sound good, but what do I learn? Elaborate theories. There are examples given in story format, which, in my opinion, is the more effective way to do it, but most are very basic and don't inspire much; they are also far between.

As mushy and predictable as they could sometimes be, the Chicken Soup for the Souls series actually provides many inspiring stories and ways to face realistic difficulties and challenges. They are good at opening the mind to looking at things from different perspectives.

I'm very sure the author is a very wonderful and optimistic person, and he means to help people with this book. I genuinely believe and applaud that. Unfortunately, challenges in life are not black and white. Theories are good (maybe), but I think most decently motivated people already know most of those; the challenge is how to fit them into specific circumstances, which is the area in which we need the most help. And unfortunately, it is hard to find a good fit without adjustments, and in reality, nicely polished advice doesn't apply to everyone.

This is my personal opinion though. It might fit into what others are looking for.

3 out of 5

BOOK REVIEW: Dogteeth and Other Tales of the Paranormal (Gene Kendall)

 

Rounded up from 4.5

This book is a collection of short stories, full of imagination and creativity. One can jump from one story to another and be amazed at how the characters and world have changed. Some endings are abrupt, but that is the charm of short stories. Some leave us wanting more, while the rest feel incomplete.

Some elements made me chuckle, like how the author pokes at many questionable things in our current society. For example, the absurdity of social media that continues to exist because there is a demand for it, and the willingness to go into ‘character’ when portraying and investigating something beyond common sense in Judith Rintaro and Fatty Blue. These topics are entertaining in a sad way. There are stories that are touching and intriguing in different ways, like Easy Peasy and Temptation.

Ironically, my least favorite story is the one picked as the title. Perhaps because I checked out the performed audio version pointed out by the author. Maybe it’s just not my thing because it is a very high-quality production. I grew up during the time when radio drama was a thing. We listened to stories performed by multiple actors without any visuals, and that was sometimes the only entertainment we got. This is something similar. However, I found it overacted, and the pace is a bit off, making the story feel so slow that I still barely had any idea what creatures they were and how the world worked with fifteen minutes left, which, sorry, I gave up and switched to the book. The background noises are too loud and distracting and sometimes become headache-inducing. The narration style also takes away the fight scene; it’s like I’m hearing the story recited by my grandpa, not by someone experiencing it like the protagonist. Again, this is my personal view; I believe others would appreciate it more because, as said, it’s a high-quality production. Besides this, which shouldn’t affect my review of the story, I found it’s not as compelling as others.

Overall, this is a good short story collection for fans of the supernatural and paranormal genres. I am not one, but I can appreciate the creativity, storytelling, characters, and world-building.

Fake Author Plague

 

One day, I got a follower on Twitter. Whenever I get followers, I check them out, and if they look genuine, I follow back. Sadly, those sexy profiles who are calling me sexy are bots. I know that because I can’t be that sexy.

Anyway, this one is from an author. I created Twitter to market my book. Obviously, I fail to do that because I don’t want to flood others’ feeds with unsolicited advertisements. I only mention my books when it feels natural and fits into the topic, which is not often. Fortunately, while starting as a miserable existence, I enjoy Twitter now because I get to connect with authors and readers. So, imagine my delight that this follow came from a well-established author—or so it seemed.

With a lot of books and an avatar with a face (I don’t even have that!), she has an underwhelming number of followers ratio. It didn’t flinch me at all because I know how sucky it could be to exist on social media. I followed back, and ding, a few seconds later, there was a DM from her. Wait, what? I get to chat with a famous author? She has many successful books with more than thousands of ratings while I almost sold my left toe to get one review. It started with a simple ‘Hello.’

At that time, I had these influxes of book marketers pestering me to use their service by flooding my DM without bothering to check on my work. The process was similar: they followed, and I followed back; since they were not sexy bots (I was a sweet summer child), I thought they were genuine users who were there for their businesses. (After all, I am, too!). However, a second later, I'd get a DM. They would then ask questions about what kind of books I wrote, etc., mostly things they could find out by checking my profile if they really cared. Of course, they didn’t. I assume they use algorithms or some kind of premade responses because if I engaged with them, the conversation would feel weird yet not totally detached. If you watch any video about scam baiters, these are similar kinds of conversations: trying to sound interested, but the conversation is all over the place unless they offer their services.

Anyway, I eagerly wrote back to reply to her hello, and with my gullible behind, I also included ‘I am so glad you are a real author. I was afraid this was a DM from another persistent marketer. I had too many of them lately’. She lol-ed and proceeded to ask what I wrote (fair enough btw, but I assume one would check before initiating contact, just like when I checked her profile and books before even following back). I answered and complimented her books (which indeed look impressive) and where she was from (Japan, a country with many things I’m impressed with). She replied, although she sounded a bit odd (again, detached but trying to keep me on), and gave me links to her book, throwing hints about how awesome they were. It went on for a bit.

Okay, I started to feel weird and unnatural. The conversations are mostly one-sided, and I felt like we were talking about different things that reset every time she DM-ed. So, like the civilized anti-social ahole I am, I spaced out and stopped responding. Nothing happened for a few days, and then it started again. ‘Hello.’ I recognized this pattern with all the marketers and shady characters who had DM-ed me. The conversation with the fake Japanese author probably took longer than usual because imagine being fake and my first conversation was, 'I am glad you are not fake.' They had to attempt to recover from that first, which also makes me think, most likely, that these fakers are mixtures of bots and humans.

During this time, there were more and more posts on Twitter from genuine authors about fake authors. These fakers personate famous/successful authors, even adopting their links, bios, and avatars. They then initiate chats with unknown authors like me. What is the purpose? Apparently, they will offer their services (I am not even sure) because they are awesome and successful, and we suck, basically, so we have to 'learn' from them. This sounds idiotic and obvious, but sadly, most authors appreciate others' input, and we didn't think there would be fake authors out there for this purpose. We are also over the moon thinking successful authors are engaging with us. Look, I worship no one, but I would probably shake in my boots if I had that kind of connection. I haven’t experienced it that far, but some authors said these fakers would go on to criticize and berate their work ‘nicely’ about their covers, statistics, sales, marketing efforts, etc, and that we are in dire need of advice. It might sound trivial, but most of the time, we question ourselves and our books daily. Most of us are treading on shaky foundations because it’s hard to justify doing this. We don’t need these craps.

Since then, I have ignored all similar DMs, especially from those who would DM in seconds after I followed back (marketers, fake authors and artists are flooding Twitter now). This industry continues to amaze me because I thought struggling authors were already at the bottom of the barrel, yet there are elaborate scammers out there still. Dang it.

Fortunately, after a long drought, I got a wonderful review about my book, The Bet of the Monsters. It gives me the spark to remember I should never give up. To think that there is someone who likes my book besides me is exhilarating, especially when they really understand my story.

Review for The Bet of the Monsters

As always, thank you for being here. I hope that for every doubt you have about what you do, there is something that will restore your faith.

BOOK REVIEW: Black Hole Radio (Furilani) by Ann Birdgenaw

 

3.5 out of 5

I was hoping to read some deeper character developments or improvements to the main storyline; after all, this is the fifth book I have read in the series. However, everyone remains the same, and the plot remains the same: little mentions about the characters’ school lives, sucked into the black hole radio, meeting alien species, bad ugly, good cute, and characters do some elaborate things to save the oppressed aliens, all the while barely have any sense of danger or worries, and everything always goes in their way, regardless of how elaborate the challenges and threats they face. I also have more struggle to like the characters; they still feel detached and annoying at times, and the implication of cheating in their sports game is a bit hard to brush off.

However, maybe I’m reading and wanting it to be a more mature book that doesn’t simplify issues that much, and that must be the wrong way of reading it because this book is definitely not intended for me. Most likely, the target audience would like it the way it is. Furilani is a fast-read, entertaining book, with the idea of sploot being the winner. I like their uniqueness and their camouflage ability. Besides that, world-building is creative and fun.

The main storyline is for the characters to take pity and try to free these sploots, who have become merely fashion, hanging onto the owners as part of accessories. Although thankfully, they don’t have to be dead for that. I feel that with this plot, a big loophole hasn’t been answered. For their ability and intelligence, it becomes questionable why sploots can’t save themselves because they are clearly very capable of doing so. Something is missing about why they ‘oblige’ when they can easily escape. It doesn’t have to be extravagant; maybe the bad guy has some other control over them instead of just questionable physical control. In that way, the ending would work better, that the sploots want to entertain, not have to, and maybe they can still become ‘fashion’ by being happy pets and bring out the colors without being forced because, after all, the evil characters and community changing their minds, habits, and cultures over a parade is just too magical.