It has been a while. I was away for a family reunion and had
an unexpected health issue that required hospitalization, but it’s all well
now.
Before they knew what to do with me, I was put in a big room
and wheeled here and there with many other patients. The room was full, filled
with beds in every corner; some were even put in the middle. We never stayed in
the same spot, they would take us to the X-ray room, Ultrasound, blood test,
this corner for picture taking, and other corners for questioning, insurance,
making sure you pay, interrogation, confession, presentation for your
appliances’ expired warranty, etc. So, every staff member was busy and it was
not easy to even ask for a pillow. It was an A&E area where I had a
chance to observe human vulnerability.
Obviously, due to the nature of hospitals, we are reminded
about how dependent we are on all these technologies and other human beings
during sickness. The feeling of being completely in others’ mercy, skills, and
knowledge is humbling. I have watched too many true crimes and documentaries
about how easy it is for people in the medical field to harm or mess up, but
those didn’t bother me that day.
It was more about what I witnessed. I saw all kinds of
people in one of their most vulnerable conditions. We wore ill-fitting issued
clothes, and we were like lost puppies looking at the staff, trying to catch
what they were whispering about, decipher the displays on the monitor,
interpreting the hmm and the nods or head shakings, the dread of finding what
made you there, the hope pairing with the anxiety of getting your turn, and the
constant beeps of everything around. Many elderly were distraught and kept
looking for their loved ones, mainly their children; some couldn’t even
communicate.
It’s heartbreaking to witness the helplessness and
vulnerability, and how amazing it is to see a face I am familiar with, my rock
even when I am strong.
Oh well, I always think we are created with too many flaws,
but someone would whack my head and say that makes us human. Whatever it is, I
wish you all strength and happiness.
My schedule is messed up now, and I would need more time to
prepare for my new book. However, your holiday is over! I am here to ramble
again. Thank you for being here.
